—Ford River
Rouge
I’d walk up
the hill through wild grasses
rich with
milkweed and flags and make a nest
in the
place I’d tamped down over the days
of decent
weather. The view was something
terrifying
and never the same:
on calm
days the great plumes rose straight up
to insult
the delicate nostrils of angels.
I was
twenty-four and had no use
for the God
of my fathers, no use for anything
spiritual.
I believed in the deepest organs,
the liver,
the kidneys, the heart, the lungs.
Nonetheless
as I sat cross-legged drinking
chocolate
milk words came on the wind.
Can you
imagine God speaking to you
as you ate
a little round store-bought pie
on a
hilltop in Dearborn, where no Jews
were
welcomed, where the wind came
in waves
through the wild grasses
that had
the guts to thrive? How I yearned
for the
character of weeds and grass
that seemed
more mysterious and grand
than the
words the wind scattered through air
so fetid it
was sweet. Noon, May 12,
1952. I
wrote it on a calendar
at home and
later threw the thing away.
You want
those words, you who still believe,
who think
the exact words are essential
to your
salvation or whatever
it is you
pray for? I’ll take you there
on a spring
day of wind and low gray sky,
a Dearborn
day. We’ll bring two quarts
of
chocolate milk and little store-bought
pies—apple,
cherry, or pineapple,
each worse
than the other—and find the nest
of fifty
years ago, and maybe we’ll smoke
as all
young men did, and lean back
into the
flattened grass, and rest our heads
on the cold
ground while we add our own
exhalations
to the exquisite chaos
of the air,
and commune with whoever.